I woke up this morning feeling 'off'. I am suddenly overwhelmed by the little things I've been doing every day. I won't go so far as to say 'depressed', thats not it, this is more of anxiety paralysis and generally feeling chaotic. I can't focus & when I start to enumerate all the things I need to do my brain blanks out, literally - i can't tell you what I was thinking about a few moments prior.
Maybe i've been reading too many gloomy forecasts this week? Perhaps going to the mainland got me out of my daily groove. Or did being among 7 million people make me truly understand the gravity of our situation. All of the above? Or maybe I'm just over-agitated by 4 days of sustained winds - wind makes me edgy, it always has. I definitely fear for my friends on the mainland and seeing them last week dropped that in my lap like a ton of bricks. Maybe the visit accelerated my gnawing worry that I'm running out of time to get the garden dialed in. Something ramped me up a notch, that's for sure.
I'm not whining, mind you. I'm thinking out loud and perplexed that I'm suddenly overwhelmed by the life that didn't bother me one whit 3 weeks ago.
Has anyone else experienced something like this? You're going along just fine, then a sudden onset of anxiety? Any advice on how you got out of your rut? I'm going to write a to-do list & prioritize it for starters.
Very frustrating. I'm feeling very wimpy that I'm even experiencing this. This isn't the approach that'll get me through the tough stuff.
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I really enjoy your posts about your garden and farming practices. It is def a dream of mine to have my own farm, maybe in Costa Rica or Hawaii. Let me ask you, being from the mainland, do you ever experience Island Fever?
I know I go through my gamut of emotions sometimes...smooth sailing then BAM! the only thing that motivates me is not doing anything. I think for me, I can trace it back to sleep. I can get by a couple days with 4-5 hrs a night, but anything after that and my mood is erratic at best and my motivation to work/thrive is cut in half. What I love is my routine of waking early, getting a vigorous workout with some good music, get my bfast and coffee and get going with the day. Mornings, when it's peaceful and quiet, are my favorite. It just sucks waking up early!
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